Social media has shined a light on bullying. It doesn’t just happen on the playground, it has gone viral.
“Today I can admit I spent the majority of time in my childhood, teen years and as a young adult hiding behind a ‘tough guy’ image. I had developed a reputation for being the silent observer with questioning facial expressions that pushed people back a step or two.
Sports gave me a chance to be one of the gang but even then I became the enforcer or punisher. You wanted to be on my team so I would protect you. Those who had heard about my reputation didn’t want to square off with me across the scrimmage line and become my enemy for as long as the game lasted.
I knew people were afraid of me, but what they missed was I was afraid of them. If they got too close they would find out how powerless I was over my own life. Alcohol ruled my house and my parents were both its slaves.”
When life has left you alone in your own family it is hard to believe other men will accept you just the way you are. In P4 groups we talk about ‘Come Ugly’ because that is how all of us show up, no perfectionism in our men’s groups. Come as you are, as broken, beaten down, discourage, hopeless, drained, ready to through in the towel. The important thing is honesty. Risking to tell other men how trying to figure things out on your own hasn’t worked. When you admit you need their help it can be a gut wrenching experience.When one does ‘Come Ugly’ often there is a sense of peace that comes, followed by hope. When you stop hiding you can start growing. Let us know if we can be of help.
