Who Is Your Daughter Listening To? Her Father or Taylor Swift

Power of 4 is all about men meeting each other, sharing wisdom and perspectives, and supporting one another. As Christians, we seek to apply our faith to our relationships and to the issues we face in our lives. Among us, fathers often discuss who and what are influencing their children, both sons and daughters.

Taylor Swift has captivated audiences during her 19-year run as a recording artist and performer. Nearly half of Americans consider themselves at least somewhat fans of Taylor Swift and her music. Her fan base ranges from her own age group (33) to as young as 13. She has written and performed songs about her experiences, feelings, and thoughts. Over time, her beliefs have also become newsworthy.

“As a father of a 20 something college age daughter who knows most of the lyrics of Taylor Swift’s songs I woke up to the fact my daughter’s views were being shaped by the influence of her musical choices much like I was when I was in college. That scared me because those influences tempted me to experiment and bet my life that I was bullet proof back then.

I only have one daughter. I didn’t have any sisters and I lost my mother to cancer when I was in my twenties so I don’t have mom to advise me about reaching out to my daughter.

The posts I have read about Taylor Swift being a Christian have not decreased my concern, just the opposite.

I am a father seeking help.”

If you have a daughter and need advice on fathering her, asking women can be helpful, but consulting fathers with daughters can provide even more insights. Ultimately, it's more about you embodying the role of the father that God designed you to be than about your daughter. Other fathers can help guide you in this aspect of your masculinity.

We hope you can join a Power of 4 (P4) group with at least two other men who have daughters the same age as yours or older. Invest yourself in asking insightful questions and listening to their wisdom. Then, learn to follow the Spirit during your conversations and discussions with your daughter. Be quick to listen and slow to speak; find out what she thinks and feels first. Then ask her if there's more she wants to say. Begin by sharing your feelings toward her and pause to let her respond. Focus on strengthening your emotional closeness rather than laying down rules, judgments, and standards. Emotional closeness is far more effective in motivating better decision-making.

Be sure to debrief with your group, remembering that fatherhood is a lifelong journey. Your aim should be to ensure your daughter hears the 'soul song' from your fatherly heart. Once she hears it, she will never forget it. Let us know if we can assist you further.